


Of colors and scents

by neogotme



Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: Angst, I love donghyuck I'm sorry, M/M, Romance, Suicidal Thoughts
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-10
Updated: 2018-05-10
Packaged: 2019-05-04 18:23:23
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 580
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14598993
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/neogotme/pseuds/neogotme
Summary: Haechan associates Colors and Scents to memories or moments he can't seem to forget.





	Of colors and scents

**Author's Note:**

> Eyo! I'm back at it again being the sleep deprived bitch I am. Enjoy and sorry in advance.

Lucas was the name of the guy that made Haechan heart pound so fast and so loud, made his cheeks flushed, and as cliche’ as it may sound, gave butterflies to his stomach. He was 15 at that time, still not quite sure if it was love that he was currently feeling. But as he reminisced the moment they said those 3 words to each other, the color that came to his mind was pastel pink, representing such innocent love that was presented at the memory of his ex lover, and the scent that reminds him of his first love was the sweet aroma of vanilla. 

Lucas however maybe the first one to make his heart pound, he was also the first one to break it. And such heartbreaking scene of Lucas reciting such words that pierced Haechan’s heart reminds Haechan of the color he hated the most, Purple. Now, Haechan knows that Purple to other people is beautiful, but purple to Haechan is the symbolism of cruelty and arrogance, things in which he hated the most. Call him immature if you want but he can’t help himself to hate Lucas and the things he made Haechan feel. He hates the fact that he let himself get too attached to a person that he knew isn’t permanent, He hates the fact that after 2 years he still can’t move on, and most of all, He hates the fact that he made himself revolve around Lucas and how he unconsciously made Lucas his world. Too unrequited, Too pathetic and now Lucas only reminds Haechan of the scent of flowers.  
The scent Gardenia, Jasmine and Hyacinth, those three might have the best fragrance but too much can be sickening. And too much love for someone whom isn’t permanent is sickening. 

And as if he wasn’t broken enough,  
People around him only added fuel to the hatred he feels about himself. It was as if guns, arrows and knives are continuously thrown at him. He felt unneeded, worthless and useless, and suddenly as the overwhelming feelings made black clouds form around his mind, He felt...nothing.  
He was so desperate to feel something, anything. He looked at the blade that was slowly forming fresh wounds on his wrists, blood trickling down from the wounds. He still felt nothing.  
Remembering those moments only made Haechan see nothing but a pitch black and a scent he can’t distinguish. 

It felt as if he was walking down a dark road with nowhere to go and still trying to figure out alot of things. 

And then he met Mark.  
There are so much colors and scents that can be associated with what Mark made Haechan feel. It made Haechan feel intoxicated, He did everything just to make the boy love him, but nothing worked. For Mark is inlove with a girl named Herin.  
Haechan can’t do anything but to watch them from afar, and admire the color of red that’s emitting from them symbolizing how much they love each other. He watch them share their first kiss, whispering sweet nothings to each other. Watch them get married. Haechan never got tired of watching. 

For maybe love is not always having the main character to have someone requite the love that the main character is giving, it’s probably also having the main character watch that certain someone in the arms of a person whom he/she loves the most. 

And for maybe, Happy Endings aren’t always for everyone.

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you so much for reading and comment down your thoughts and also I'm sorry I'm still improving I promise.


End file.
